Guest Post by Martina Mangelsdorf
Not matter how much we’d love to exceed our objectives year in and out, you will never be a high-flyer all the time . If you have just received a bad performance review, either the negative review is justified because you really didn’t achieve your goals, or you have been rated unfairly.
No matter what, both options are bitter. Still it’s not the review in itself, but how you deal with the consequences that will make or break your career. So if you happen to find yourself in such a situation, here is a little bit of First Aid advice to recover fast – and eloquently:
In the moment: Listen thoughtfully
If the information you get is a complete surprise to you (which it shouldn’t be!) or if you feel too overwhelmed to respond immediately, tell your manager that you would like some time to digest everything that has been said and request a time to meet again. Resist the temptation to counter everything that has been said, because you’ll end up in a fight you’re never going to win.
Go and take some time out
Calm down, cool down. Accept your emotions but don’t let them get the best of you. Acknowledge them, then let them pass. Your main goal now is to find something that motivates you to get through this. It can be a bigger sense of purpose, your longer term career aspirations or your ambition to grow. Self-motivation is an important muscle to flex in this situation. Slide in the dip of your motivation curve but come back up! After all, this review is just one chapter in your career.
Learn, learn, learn
When you feel up to it, thoroughly analyze what went wrong or what prevented you from succeeding. Your principal objective for the next year is to learn from this negative experience and ensure that it doesn’t happen again. That’s all you got to care about, so LEARN the hell out of this experience – later on in life you will look back and find that the worst crisis are the best teachers.
Ask for training
Consider asking for training if you failed because of lack of knowledge. Ask your manager or the Human Resources department for guidance and information on available programs. Keep in mind that training is more than just classroom education.
Relationship-based learning through mentoring or coaching as well as development in role or stretch assignments are often even more powerful. If your company is interested in grooming you for more responsibility take it as a compliment – training is expensive and a sign that your company is invested in your growth with them.
Accept and move on
Last but not least, move on. Nothing will change if you continue to fume and wallow over negative aspects of a performance review. Once you accepted the review and have sought appropriate remedies, don’t hang on to the negativity and its toxic impact on your motivation and future performance.
At all times, even when the performance rating is not what you have expected, stay professional. You might experience this event as failure, but it’s really only one of the many challenges you’ll come across in your career.
And it’s exactly these challenges that get you eager and committed to grow beyond your current performance and fuel your career. No one ever rose to the top without overcoming roadblocks that seem hard to conquer at first, so why would you?
Guest Author
Martina Mangelsdorf is a thought-leader on generational differences in the workplace and the founder of GAIA Insights, a boutique firm specialized in engaging, developing and retaining corporate Generation Y talent. She has created a unique Gen Y Performance Review Toolkit that helps you to be fully prepared for this crucial conversation. It offers step-by-step guidance and plenty of practical tips to transform the performance review from a scary monster to a platform to unleash your potential. Click here to check it out.
Loved this post! I do think asking the right questions when confronted with a negative performance review is essential…too often, the leader thinks they’ve adaquately communicated all that is expected when in fact they have not.
I know when I was younger I just assumed I had not “gotten the big picture” but in truth, it had never been adequately conveyed to me…I wish I’d just asked more questions.
LaRae, thanks for adding your comment. I fully agree with you! I wish more experienced people would answer “Asking more questions” when they’re supposed to say what kind of avice they would give to young professionals… we’d all learn so much more and would save ourselves a lot of trouble if we asked more/earlier/smarter questions.
Terrific post, Martina! We all want to feel that we are being received well and that others see our potential, but as you point out so beautifully, this doesn’t always happen.
I loved your idea of taking time to process the review and feedback in a calm way, instead of just shooting back an angry response. This interaction should never be an ambush so if one is totally surprised, that issue has to be addressed also.
I also find talking the points through with someone else either in the organization or outside who knows you can be helpful.
Well done, Martina!
Thank you Terri, I’m glad you enjoyed the post. Talking the experience through with someone else is a great point. Often times it helps to get the honest perspective of a friend or mentor who might as well tell us that what we heard is not necessarily what has been said. In other words, sometimes we tend to interpret feedback in a very self-critical way and someone else can point out that the actual message was much less dramatic than we thought. Getting another point of view can help us see the silver lining. (And even if the criticism was justified, we’ll digest it more easily with a little help from someone we trust…)
Alli, thank you for your comment – excellent suggestion to ask what strong performance or “meeting expectations” looks like! I’d add to that to make sure that you get a concrete response that actually states measurable KPIs. Otherwise, you might get answers such as “outstanding customer service” and then it is still debatable at the end of the year whether your service was in fact outstanding or not!
Good advice, Martina! I’d also ask questions to understand what strong performance looks like (or at least meeting expectations!). That would give me some really concrete expectations to take with me and strive for in the coming weeks and months.
Love that you pointed out that the learning that takes places isn’t only closing a skills gap but also learning how to take moments like this and move forward with confidence and courage. One bad review doesn’t define you and despite how it feels will not follow you for the rest of your life. It’s how you react, learn and grow that will set you apart.