“She/he must have thicker skin.”
We hear these statements, and what rings through our mind is “toughen up.” There is truth in this thought. We do need to have thick skin in our life.
Many things come at us –
- Making ends meet
- Surviving annual reviews
- Being told you are not good enough or smart enough
- Being ignored
- Raising teens
- Getting old
- Navigating troubled economic times
You, undoubtedly, can add to this list. Especially over the last several years, we get worn out trying to keep up with everything and worrying about when some of the uncertainty will disappear. Tensions seem more apt to grow than dissipate.
Thicker skin is a requirement in today’s world. In reality, it was no different 100 years ago. Different challenges just existed then. Think about the wagon trains moving from East to West. Think about turning soil over for crops with just one plowshare and a horse or mule. Think about surviving a blizzard huddled in a sod house in the middle of the prairies – no wind break, no way to escape the blistering cold winds.
We have always encountered challenges. In many ways, it is part of being human. We don’t live in heaven. We live on earth, and we are constantly tested. Why? It is what helps us grow in our understanding and our capabilities. It challenges our soul, mind, and body to get better in all that we do. It is more than just surviving; it is transforming ourselves from the conditions we encounter.
The conditions we meet include:
- Environmental changes
- Economic shifts
Again, you can add to this list, given your own set of experiences. No one is immune from good or bad conditions. This fact is the primary reason we need to have thick skin.
Thick skin gives us the ability to:
- Absorb constructive feedback. We need to take in comments and observations that will enable us to learn how to do better, learn more, and return a higher level on whatever our life gifts are. It is reflection based on converting feedback into renovated actions.
- Deflect inaccurate or hurtful criticism. People or situations will try to slow us down at times. We need to weather the storms and gain strength. These are the situations, sometimes, that carve in our skin’s character lines.
- Thrive in uncertainty and through tests. With our internal strength of spirit, we can do more than just survive unexpected encounters and life-changing events. We can gain a renewed commitment or a refreshed outlook. We cannot afford to be clamped down for one simple reason – life is too short.
- Maintain momentum forward. One step back and two steps forward still give us forward momentum. The one step back should be the absorption moment, reflecting and transforming ourselves and our mission. We should be propelled out of this step with more forward motion than before.
Having thick skin is vital. It is our protection, yet it is not only a shield. It is what enables us to shed what is unimportant and focus on our core purpose. Thick skin is what bounds us to our life purpose while enabling us to reach outside of it and continue our spirited, meaningful work.
What helps you develop thick skin? How has your thick skin helped you thrive in uncertain times?